OK. I understand the time pressures on commuters first thing in the morning. But, please, please, please, try to have a dump BEFORE you leave for work in the morning.
This morning I was idly having a wee in the gents at work when some guy (I've no idea who it was - he just silently came in and closed the cubicle door behind himself) started doing a poo at work. And my god, what a poo!
I swear that in one swift movement he'd dropped his trousers, sat down and emptied the entire contents of his bowels within 15 seconds flat.
As if the sound of faeces hitting water weren't bad enough, he insisted on grunting like a Russian female tennis player throughout, and the smell was bloody sickening!
Don't even ask me why the action of wiping ones arse needs to be done so rapidly, nor why it takes several minutes, followed by even more grunting.
And for god's sake, why do blokes insist on sitting there with their trousers right down round their ankles? There's no need for it! It's no sodding wonder there's so many scruffy bastards at work.
Come on guys. Do us all a favour. Go before you leave home in future.
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